I got a notification before I slept last night, that today was my 2 year anniversary on WordPress. Exciting! I had a gin and tonic to celebrate later on in the day. Anyway, I have decided to take a trip down memory lane to two years ago to commemorate the day.
Two years ago at this time, I was in a relationship that had reached its end (I was the one still holding on to it, but it was dead.) I didn’t want to lose my investment. I was attached to him, or I felt I was, I don’t remember. All I know was I was a mess. I’d just done a big chop two weeks before. I had also started my Interior design course. Just 24, living in denial and in turmoil. I didn’t feel right, I was fully hurting. To be honest, though I was opening new chapters, I had crashed. My life as I knew it was coming to a close.
Then one day, I was mindlessly browsing the internet, when I decided I needed a space to write my thoughts. Something private for me to share with a few friends whenever I didn’t know how to explain my feelings. Also, (I’m not embarrassed to say), it’s something my ex always did, so I thought, what would I lose if I did too? So that night, I got myself a blog. The next few nights I went HAM and wrote! Now of course it being the internet, and I’m not stupid, I barely scratched the surface. I just wrote little pieces when I felt overwhelmed until the last nail was finally pushed into my relationship coffin and I fell back!
I needed time to heal away from everyone. So I deleted my Twitter and Instagram accounts and zoned out. I almost deleted the blog but I knew I I needed it. Self care is important! I learnt that during the time. I watched me slowly pick myself up (therapy helped too) without distractions and much interaction from the outside world. I started to see the beauty in me. While at this, I also realised how much I didn’t like the course I was doing so I dropped it.
I’ve been working on different things since then and I now love where I am. I keep talking about baby steps. They’re not seen to sow at the beginning but I’ve come a long way and I’m proud of me. 🥂